屍速列車2 到底在幹嘛 - 電影

By Robert
at 2020-07-27T08:36
at 2020-07-27T08:36
Table of Contents
我人生第一篇電影版心得
在2016年9月
獻給屍速列車1
當時我給了好雷
現在我好想回到過去
跟當時的自己下跪
:我不該去看第二集毀了這部電影在我心裡的感覺
一開始在船上
我已經看得頗生氣了
這些人到底在幹嘛
為什麼沒有先篩檢就瞎雞巴放人上船
拜託不要再犯這種低級失誤好嗎
沒有看預告的我以為姪子才是主角
他會長大變成海報裡的帥哥
完全沒想到他這麼快下去吃便當
好吧
船戲那邊就開始展現第一集也很莫名奇妙的毛病
濾鏡全開+背景音樂催下去
好像不哭對不起列祖列宗那樣
但當下我是很尷尬的觀察我旁邊有沒有人哭
進入正片之後
我一直覺得
這些人怎麼講英文這麼有禮貌啊
完全不帶髒字耶(不是重點)
上島之後
一開始
一開始還蠻緊張的
找到貨車之後
全 員 降 智
不排除原本智商就不高
我阿嬤來看都知道駕駛座那個不補他兩槍他一定會起床咬你
可是敢死隊沒有人知道
國中妹妹飆車也蠻帥的
男主角也蠻帥的
好像為了強調這兩點最後的可取之處
導演無時無刻就是在特寫男主角的臉
他一直用同個表情出現在大螢幕
好啦 真的很帥
但大概第八個特寫就真的
夠了 導演 可以了 放過我
飆車同理 狂拍猛拍
(劇情邏輯的東西我們不要去討論
沒有的東西就是沒有
討論完也不會有)
中間就是一堆
蛤
三小
到底在幹嘛!!!!!!!!
的劇情
尤其救姐夫那邊
我都開始懷疑他們是不是有什麼
姐姐死掉之後落魄失意喝醉的姐夫
告訴男主角「你跟你姐姐長得很像」
之類的劇情
不然誰會這樣救自己姐夫/前妻弟弟
救駕失敗
導演馬上給男主角一個
慢動作掃射+濾鏡+背景音樂套餐
我當下很想笑
可是笑出來感覺很缺德XD
前面一直覺得殭屍比我養的貓智商還低
我的貓都不會這麼認真追逗貓棒了
沒想到還有智商更低的
黃中士
不是啊兄弟
你根本不知道車子上面有什麼
你跟人家追得那麼開心
到底在幹嘛!!!!!!!
後面徐太尉出來搶車然後大家一起下去也是
我感覺導演是想做一個
哈哈 想不到吧
的感覺
但這就很常識的黑吃黑啊
這不是12歲以上都知道會發生的事嗎
有太多地方毫無驚喜
看著他們在螢幕上出現
內心就
:嗯嗯 屍體在說話
最後的結尾
我真的受夠了
就是
濾鏡+背景音樂套餐
加量不加價
媽媽到底要拖多久
啊你們肉眼可視她槍抵在脖子
那說真的這距離也沒很遠吧
國中妹妹前面一直營造一種成熟可靠的形象
這邊
強 行 降 智
直接變成大賣場哭鬧小孩
拜託!!!!
導演!!!!!!!
不要再這樣了!!!!!!!
後面大家拉拉扯扯的時候
我已經放空
想著
幹 好想尿尿
男主突然決定去救媽媽
還救成功了
我就在想 那幹嘛不一開始就過去
在這邊搞得大家都很尷尬
這時候
我旁邊的男友開始微微抽動
我偷瞄他
他居然在笑
他居然在小女孩奔向媽媽的畫面笑
我轉回去看螢幕
我也開始笑
幹 為什麼珍要從背景一起慢動作啦XD
明明是催淚場面
但我們兩個就是
科科科科科這樣笑完
最後結局
國中妹說我們之前住的世界也不錯啊
當時除了覺得怎麼不把她放回去以外
我認真思考
這部電影
有人求生意志很強
非逃出去不可嗎?
沒有耶
大家一臉我沒差啊
連男主角也是耶
那這些人
到底
在幹嘛
最後
如果你有抽到藝fun券
拿去買書吧
至少書還可以拍照po IG假裝自己有讀書
但是讓朋友知道你去看屍速列車2
還蠻丟臉的
(最後有人知道為什麼他們拿槍隨便掃
路邊的車防盜系統都是開的
可是他們隨便開車門就可以直接開走嗎?)
--
在2016年9月
獻給屍速列車1
當時我給了好雷
現在我好想回到過去
跟當時的自己下跪
:我不該去看第二集毀了這部電影在我心裡的感覺
一開始在船上
我已經看得頗生氣了
這些人到底在幹嘛
為什麼沒有先篩檢就瞎雞巴放人上船
拜託不要再犯這種低級失誤好嗎
沒有看預告的我以為姪子才是主角
他會長大變成海報裡的帥哥
完全沒想到他這麼快下去吃便當
好吧
船戲那邊就開始展現第一集也很莫名奇妙的毛病
濾鏡全開+背景音樂催下去
好像不哭對不起列祖列宗那樣
但當下我是很尷尬的觀察我旁邊有沒有人哭
進入正片之後
我一直覺得
這些人怎麼講英文這麼有禮貌啊
完全不帶髒字耶(不是重點)
上島之後
一開始
一開始還蠻緊張的
找到貨車之後
全 員 降 智
不排除原本智商就不高
我阿嬤來看都知道駕駛座那個不補他兩槍他一定會起床咬你
可是敢死隊沒有人知道
國中妹妹飆車也蠻帥的
男主角也蠻帥的
好像為了強調這兩點最後的可取之處
導演無時無刻就是在特寫男主角的臉
他一直用同個表情出現在大螢幕
好啦 真的很帥
但大概第八個特寫就真的
夠了 導演 可以了 放過我
飆車同理 狂拍猛拍
(劇情邏輯的東西我們不要去討論
沒有的東西就是沒有
討論完也不會有)
中間就是一堆
蛤
三小
到底在幹嘛!!!!!!!!
的劇情
尤其救姐夫那邊
我都開始懷疑他們是不是有什麼
姐姐死掉之後落魄失意喝醉的姐夫
告訴男主角「你跟你姐姐長得很像」
之類的劇情
不然誰會這樣救自己姐夫/前妻弟弟
救駕失敗
導演馬上給男主角一個
慢動作掃射+濾鏡+背景音樂套餐
我當下很想笑
可是笑出來感覺很缺德XD
前面一直覺得殭屍比我養的貓智商還低
我的貓都不會這麼認真追逗貓棒了
沒想到還有智商更低的
黃中士
不是啊兄弟
你根本不知道車子上面有什麼
你跟人家追得那麼開心
到底在幹嘛!!!!!!!
後面徐太尉出來搶車然後大家一起下去也是
我感覺導演是想做一個
哈哈 想不到吧
的感覺
但這就很常識的黑吃黑啊
這不是12歲以上都知道會發生的事嗎
有太多地方毫無驚喜
看著他們在螢幕上出現
內心就
:嗯嗯 屍體在說話
最後的結尾
我真的受夠了
就是
濾鏡+背景音樂套餐
加量不加價
媽媽到底要拖多久
啊你們肉眼可視她槍抵在脖子
那說真的這距離也沒很遠吧
國中妹妹前面一直營造一種成熟可靠的形象
這邊
強 行 降 智
直接變成大賣場哭鬧小孩
拜託!!!!
導演!!!!!!!
不要再這樣了!!!!!!!
後面大家拉拉扯扯的時候
我已經放空
想著
幹 好想尿尿
男主突然決定去救媽媽
還救成功了
我就在想 那幹嘛不一開始就過去
在這邊搞得大家都很尷尬
這時候
我旁邊的男友開始微微抽動
我偷瞄他
他居然在笑
他居然在小女孩奔向媽媽的畫面笑
我轉回去看螢幕
我也開始笑
幹 為什麼珍要從背景一起慢動作啦XD
明明是催淚場面
但我們兩個就是
科科科科科這樣笑完
最後結局
國中妹說我們之前住的世界也不錯啊
當時除了覺得怎麼不把她放回去以外
我認真思考
這部電影
有人求生意志很強
非逃出去不可嗎?
沒有耶
大家一臉我沒差啊
連男主角也是耶
那這些人
到底
在幹嘛
最後
如果你有抽到藝fun券
拿去買書吧
至少書還可以拍照po IG假裝自己有讀書
但是讓朋友知道你去看屍速列車2
還蠻丟臉的
(最後有人知道為什麼他們拿槍隨便掃
路邊的車防盜系統都是開的
可是他們隨便開車門就可以直接開走嗎?)
--
Tags:
電影
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