相似,以及互補 - 中視

By Harry
at 2008-12-12T08:58
at 2008-12-12T08:58
Table of Contents
最近有比較忠實地在看《光陰的故事》,也許是因為貼近的關係。不管是做父母
的,還是那些青少年,都映現了過往曾歷的熟悉感.看著他們因為不足而遺漏,因為
互助而圓滿。之前四人關係還沒明朗的時候,我曾覺得邦美在一起也很好,元茜成一
對應該很合適。但這樣一路看下來,我的想法卻有所改變。
就像有板友分析過的,茜與一元的天性皆聰明敏銳,尤其都非常早熟,過早去擔
起了家庭的責任;擔起過重責任的同時,那些還如同孩子般需要被保護,卻因為生活
而不堪負荷、被強迫壓抑的部分會一直無法得到安慰與成長,即使外表來看形如荊
棘,其實內在較諸一般人來說過於脆弱;加上正因為聰明敏銳,即使無心去傷害,也
會不自覺去傷害他們想要接近、幫助的人,並因為對方的受傷而受傷(比如茜對張媽
和娟娟,以及茜與一元對於彼此)。
他們習慣而且熟悉這個模式,當別人想要接近的時候,也會最先感受到危險,會
去傷害想去接近、理解他們的人。加上兩個人很相像,所以當被對方吸引的時候,那
種同類的危機感亦加劇烈。毅源和茜茜相處時,就像兩隻刺蝟,最先想到的是保護自
己,而不是相愛。茜的心理則更複雜,因為她在家庭裡得到的是愛與不安交融--會
安全地愛她的人,她無法放開心去接受(如張叔和張奶);她理應可以安全去愛的
人,卻無法給她安全感,甚至會讓她受傷(如張媽和娟娟)。所以她總是遲疑、恐
懼,等到她豁出去要試著愛對方的時候,時機已經過去了。毅源也許比茜勇敢一點,
但在愛的面前,他同樣先保護自己的自尊,而且在處於優勢的時候,無法放下身段,
寧可猜測試探、刺激對方,確認自己能夠「擁有」,而且「安全」。這種確認使沒有
足夠安全感的茜茜,無法義無反顧。所以他們注定只能錯過。
復邦和一美則相反,他們都是付出先於思考、包容先於自衛的人。一美和毅源的
關係還未明朗,暫不去述;但對復邦來說,喜歡、保護、包容茜茜,是他理所當然、
完全不需要理由的事,他知道怎麼去保護茜茜這個既倔強聰明、又脆弱善良的女孩,
即使他可能不知道茜茜在想什麼,她的腸子是怎麼轉的,但是很多時候,對於情緒和
傷害的蔓延,知其然而去行動,遠比知其所以然卻無法伸手要重要得多了。
確實,復邦和茜茜的相處,現在交往了之後,反而不如之前未交往時有趣,那是
因為他們已經跳過了「相知」過程中的試探階段,而是放下防備,把過往的理解拿出
來,在嘗試如何更進一步地陪伴對方。講得更明白一點,就像之前一美和馮拍雄交往
時,孫爸對一美諄諄教誨的「負責任」--茜茜和復邦在學著愛情裡的責任關係,在
對方快要跌倒迷失的時候扶上一把,牽持著他一起往前走。我也很喜歡美元配裡兩個
人個性擦出來的火花,也喜歡他們的鬥嘴,以及關係裡的變化,因為他們正在轉變,
從不同的方向轉移視線,開始看向對方;但我在看邦茜時,會有一種溫暖和安全感,
也許就像茜茜所感受的一樣--這個人會愛她,也會無條件地接受她的愛,因為得到
她的愛而自豪。
當我想到邦茜時,會想到他們兩個人站在一起,手挽著手往前走;或者一起騎腳
踏車,復邦像保護似的讓茜茜坐在前座;或者站在旅社前,一起仰頭看著牌子,讓對
方理解自己的感受,而且毫無阻礙地接受對方為之著想的善意--是那樣踏實的東
西。而那個東西是許毅源永遠給不起的,因為他也沒有,他做不到。
我期待美元的火花,也同樣喜歡邦茜的細水長流;而且希望這份細水長流,不會
因為現實的折磨而乾涸。事實上,一個人個性上的不足,光靠另一個人來圓滿是絕對
不會夠的,幸好他們還有村子。我想,我喜歡「光陰的故事」的原因,正是因為那種
毫無利益的計算,僅是熱心就能使全村合作起來的情誼,補足了很多很多在現代社會
可能就此破碎的不圓滿吧。:)
---
因為沒辦法每集都看(連續劇一天兩小時真的太長了),這份感想可能對劇中關
係理解有誤。不過幸好這裡有live文,某種程度上也可以及時參與。:D
另外也希望這齣戲可以圓滿結束。>_<
--
Do not seat your love upon a precipice because it is high.
別將愛放在懸崖邊,因為那裡太高了。
泰戈爾(Tagore) 漂鳥集(Stray Bird)
--
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