104-part 01 - 六人行

※ 引述《samchiu (閒祭秋)》之銘言：
104 The One With George Stephanopoulos -PART 01

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Originally written by Alexa Junge.
Transcribed by guineapig.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
PRE-INTRO-SCENE: CENTRAL PERK (ALL PRESENT EXCEPT JOEY)
楔子：中央咖啡園（除了喬伊都在）

MONICA: Alright. Phoebe?
好了嗎，菲碧？

PHOEBE: Okay, okay. If I were omnipotent for a day,
I would want, um, world peace, no more hunger,
good things for the rain-forest...And bigger boobs!
好，好，如果我可以有一天變的萬能，我會想要，嗯，世界和平，
不再有飢荒，對雨林做好事...還有更大的胸部！

ROSS: Yeah, see.. you took mine. Chandler, what about you?
對，了解...被你先說了。錢德，那你呢？

CHANDLER: Uh, if I were omnipotent for a day,
I'd.. make myself omnipotent forever.
呃，如果我有一天變的萬能，我希望...讓我自己永遠萬能

RACHEL: See, there's always one guy.
(MOCKING) "If I had a wish, I'd wish for three more wishes."
看吧，就是會有這種人。
(嘲弄) 「如果我有一個願望，我希望能多許三個願望」

(ENTER JOEY)
(喬伊進來)

ALL: Hey Joey. Hi. Hey, buddy.
嘿，喬伊，嗨，嘿，夥伴

MONICA: Hey, Joey, what would you do if you were omnipotent?
嘿，喬伊，如果有一天你變萬能的話你想做什麼？

JOEY: Probably kill myself!
大概是自殺吧！

MONICA: ..Excuse me?
...抱歉？

JOEY: Hey, if Little Joey's dead, then I got no reason to live!
嘿，如果小喬伊死了，那我也沒有理由繼續活著了！

ROSS: Joey, uh- OMnipotent.
喬伊，ㄨㄢ...萬能

JOEY: You are? Ross, I'm sorry..
你無能？羅斯，很抱歉...

(INTRO)
(片頭)

SCENE 1: CENTRAL PERK (ROSS AND MONICA ARE WATCHING PHOEBE SLEEP)
第一幕：中央咖啡園（羅斯和莫妮卡在看菲碧睡覺）

MONICA: How does she do that?
她是怎麼做到的？

ROSS: I cannot sleep in a public place.
我沒辦法在大庭廣眾下睡著

MONICA: Would you look at her? She is so peaceful.
你看看她好嗎？睡的多麼安詳

PHOEBE: (WAKING AND STARTLING THEM) Oh! What what what! ...Hi.
(醒來嚇到他們) 喔！怎麼回事！...嗨

ROSS: It's okay, y'know, you just nodded off again.
沒事的，知道嗎，你只是又夢周公了

MONICA: What's going on with you?
你是怎麼了？

PHOEBE: I got no sleep last night!
我昨晚沒睡好！

ROSS: Why?
為什麼？

PHOEBE: My grandmother has this new boyfriend,
and they're both kind of insecure in bed.
Oh, and deaf. So they're constantly, like,
having to reassure each other that they're having a good time.
You have no idea how loud they are!
我奶奶交了個新男友，他們對床上功夫都很沒有把握，
喔，又重聽。所以他們要不斷的，像是，
一定要確認彼此是否開心。你想像不到他們有多吵！

MONICA: Well, if you want, you can stay with Rachel and me tonight.
呃，你想要的話，妳今晚可以睡我跟瑞秋那

PHOEBE: Thanks.
謝謝

(ENTER CHANDLER AND JOEY. JOEY IS COUNTING HIS STEPS)
(錢德與喬伊進來，喬伊正在數步伐)

JOEY: ...Ninety-five, ninety-six, ninety-seven.
See, I told you! Less than a hundred steps from our place to here.
95、96、97...看吧，我就說吧！我們家到這裡不用一百步

CHANDLER: You got waaaay too much free time.
你真是太太太閒了

JOEY: (TO ROSS) Hey! Here's the birthday boy!
Ross, check it out: hockey tickets, Rangers-Penguins,
tonight at the Garden, and we're taking you.
(對羅斯) 嘿！壽星在這裡！羅斯，看這個：曲棍球門票，
遊騎兵對企鵝，今晚在花園廣場，我們帶你去

CHANDLER: Happy birthday, pal!
生日快樂啊，夥伴！

JOEY: We love you, man. (KISSES HIM)
我們愛你，老兄 (親他)

ROSS: Funny, my birthday was seven months ago.
真有趣，我生日是在七個月前耶

JOEY: So?
所以咧？

ROSS: So, I'm guessing you had an extra ticket
and couldn't decide which one of you got to bring a date?
所以，我猜你們多了一張票，又不能決定你們誰可以多帶一個伴

CHANDLER: Well, aren't we Mr. "The glass is half empty".
好吧，我們不是「水乾了一半」那種人

ROSS: Oh my God, oh- is today the twentieth, October twentieth?
喔，天啊，喔... 今天是20號，10月20號？

MONICA: Oh, I was hoping you wouldn't remember.
喔，我才希望你不會想起來的說

ROSS: Ohhh.
喔喔...

JOEY: What's wrong with the twentieth?
20號怎麼了？

CHANDLER: Eleven days before Hallowe'en.. all the good costumes are gone?
萬聖節的前11天... 好服裝都被挑光了？

ROSS: Today's the day Carol and I first..
consummated our physical relationship.
(JOEY IS PUZZLED) Sex. ..You know what,
I-I'd better pass on the game.
I think I'm just gonna go home and think about
my ex-wife and her lesbian lover.
今天是卡蘿跟我第一次... 完成我們肉體的關係 (喬伊很困惑)
作愛啦... 知道嗎，我...我不想去看球賽。
我只想回家去想我的前妻跟他的愛人同志

JOEY: The hell with hockey, let's all do that!
去它的曲棍球，我們一起去想吧！

CHANDLER: (TRYING TO STOP ROSS LEAVING) C'mon, Ross!
You, me, Joey, ice, guys' night out, c'mon,
whaddya say, big guy, (PRETENDING TO PUNCH HIM IN THE STOMACH)
huh? huh? huh?
(試著阻止羅斯離開) 拜託，羅斯！ 你、我、喬伊、冰塊、
男士之夜，拜託，怎樣，大朋友？ (假裝打他的胃) 啊？啊？啊？

ROSS: What are you doing?
你在做什麼？

CHANDLER: (STOPS) I have no idea.
(停住)我也不知道

JOEY: C'mon, Ross!
拜託，羅斯！

ROSS: Alright, alright, maybe it'll take my mind off it.
Do you promise to buy me a big thumb finger?
好吧，好吧，也許這能讓我不去想它。你們保證會買隻大手只給我吧？

CHANDLER: You got it.
沒問題

(RACHEL RUNS UP CLUTCHING AN ENVELOPE)
(瑞秋抖著一個信封過來)

RACHEL: Look look look look look, my first pay check!
Look at the window, there's my name! Hi, me!
看看看看看，我的第一份薪水！
看看這個標籤，上面有我的名字！嗨，我自己！

PHOEBE: I remember the day I got my first pay check.
There was a cave in in one of the mines,
and eight people were killed.
我記得我拿到第一份薪水那天。有個礦坑垮了，八人喪生。

MONICA: Wow, you worked in a mine?
哇，你以前在礦坑工作嗎？

PHOEBE: I worked in a Dairy Queen, why?
我在乳品皇后工作，問這幹嘛？

RACHEL: God, isn't this exciting? I earned this.
I wiped tables for it, I steamed milk for it, and it was totally-
(OPENS ENVELOPE) -not worth it.
Who's FICA? Why's he getting all my money?
I mean, what- Chandler, look at that.
天啊，這很令人興奮吧？我賺的耶。
我為了它擦桌子、為了它蒸牛奶，這一切真的是太 (打開信封)
...不值得了。誰是菲卡？為什麼錢都給他了？
我是說，什麼...錢德，看看它

CHANDLER: (LOOKING) Oh, this is not that bad.
(看一下)喔，也沒那麼糟啦

JOEY: Oh, you're fine, yeah, for a first job.
喔，這樣很好了，以第一份工作而言

ROSS: You can totally, totally live on this.
你可以完全，完全靠它生活了

MONICA: Yeah, yeah.
對啊，對啊

ROSS: Oh, by the way, great service tonight.
喔，順道一提，今晚服務的真棒

ALL: Oh! Yeah! (THEY GET THEIR WALLETS OUT AND GIVE GENEROUS TIPS)
喔！對啊！ (大家拿出皮夾給她慷慨的小費)

BOYS: Hockey! (THEY GO TO LEAVE BUT ARE BLOCKED BY LESLIE, KIKI AND JOANNE.
A PAUSE AS THE BOYS STARE AT THEM) Hockey! Hockey. (EXIT BOYS)
曲棍球！ (正要離開卻被萊斯利、琪琪、瓊安擋住。男生們看了一下)
曲棍球！曲棍球！(男生們離開)

LESLIE: (LOOKING ROUND) Rachel?
(環顧四週) 瑞秋？

RACHEL: Oh my God! (RACHEL, LESLIE, KIKI AND JOANNE ALL SCREAM
AND HUG EACH OTHER)
喔，天啊！ (瑞秋、萊斯利、琪琪、瓊安全部尖叫抱在一起)

MONICA: (TO PHOEBE) I swear I've seen birds do this on Wild Kingdom.
(對菲碧) 我發誓我在野生王國看過鳥這樣子

RACHEL: What are you guys doing here?
你們在這裡做什麼？

KIKI: Well, we were in the city shopping,
and your mom said you work here, aaand it's true!
呃，我們來城裡逛街，你媽說你在這裡工作，真的耶！

JOANNE: Look at you in the apron. You look like you're in a play.
看看你的圍裙！你好像在演戲一樣。

RACHEL: (TO (PREGNANT) LESLIE) Look at you, you are so big
I can't believe it!
(對懷孕的萊斯利) 看看你，大到我不敢相信了！

LESLIE: I know. I know! I'm a duplex.
我知道，我知道！ 我變成兩倍大了

RACHEL: (TO JOANNE) So what's going on with you?
(對瓊安) 你們最近過的怎樣？

JOANNE: Well, guess who my dad's making partner in his firm?
(POINTS TO HERSELF; THEY ALL SCREAM)
呃，猜猜看我爸讓誰當他的合夥人啊？ (指著自己；大家尖叫)

KIKI: And while we're on the subject of news..
(HOLDS UP HER FINGER TO SHOW A RING; THEY ALL SCREAM)
還有另外的最新消息... (舉起手秀出戒指；大家尖叫)

PHOEBE: (TO MONICA) Look, look, I have elbows! (THEY SCREAM)
(對莫妮卡)看，看啊，我有手肘耶！ (他們兩尖叫)



--