[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone except Joey
is decorating for Christmas.]
Ross: Come here, Marcel. Sit here. (Marcel wanders off)
Rachel: Pheebs, I can't believe he hasn't kissed you yet.
I mean God, by my sixth date with Paolo,
I mean he had already named both my breasts!
...Ooh. Did I just share too much?
Ross: Just a smidge.
Phoebe: David's like, y'know, Scientist Guy. He's very methodical.
Monica: I think it's romantic.
Phoebe: Me too! Oh! Did you ever see An Officer and a Gentleman?
Rachel: Yeah!
Phoebe: Well, he's kinda like the guy I went to see that with.
Except, except he-he's smarter, and gentler, and sweeter...
I just- I just wanna be with him all the time.
Day and night, and night and day... and special occasions...
Chandler: Wait a minute, wait a minute, I see where this is going,
you're gonna ask him to New Year's, aren't you.
You're gonna break the pact. She's gonna break the pact.
Phoebe: No, no, no, no, no, no. Yeah, could I just?
Chandler: Yeah, 'cause I already asked Janice.
Monica: What?!
Ross: C'mon, this was a pact! This was your pact!
Chandler: I snapped, okay? I couldn't handle the pressure and I snapped.
Monica: Yeah, but Janice? That-that was like the worst breakup in history!
Chandler: I'm not saying it was a good idea, I'm saying I snapped!
[Joey enters, his shoes have bells on, which jingle as he walks.
He is wearing a long coat.]
Joey: Hi. Hi, sorry I'm late.
(He removes the coat to reveal an elf costume)
Chandler: Too many jokes... must mock Joey!
Joey: Nice shoes, huh? (He wiggles his foot and the bells tinkle)
Chandler: Aah, y'killing me!
(Marcel knocks over some kitchen tools)
Monica: Ross! He's playing with my spatulas again!
Ross: Okay, look, he's not gonna hurt them, right?
Monica: Do you always have to bring him here?
Ross: I didn't wanna leave him alone. Alright?
We- we had our first fight this morning.
I think it has to do with my working late.
I said some things that I didn't mean, and he- he threw some faeces...
Chandler: Y'know, if you're gonna work late,
I could look in on him for you.
Ross: Oh, that'd be great! Okay, but if you do,
make sure it seems like you're there to see him,
okay, and you're not like doing it as a favour to me.
Chandler: Okay, but if he asks, I'm not going to lie.
[Scene: Max and David's lab, David is explaining something to Phoebe
with the aid of a whiteboard.]
David: ...But, you can't actually test this theory,
because today's particle accelerators are nowhere near powerful enough
to simulate these conditions.
Phoebe: Okay, alright, I have a question, then.
David: Yuh.
Phoebe: Um, were you planning on kissing me ever?
David: Uh, that's definitely a, uh, valid question.
And, uh, the answer would be (Writes YES on the board) yes.
Yes I was. But, see, I wanted it to be this phenomenal kiss
that happened at this phenomenal moment,
because, well, 'cause it's you.
Phoebe: Sure.
David: Right. But, see, the longer I waited,
the more phenomenal the kiss had to be,
and now we've reached a place where it's just gotta be
one of those things where I just like...
sweep everything off the table and throw you down on it.
And, uh, I'm not really a, uh, sweeping sorta fella.
Phoebe: Oh, David, I, I think you are a sweeping sorta fella.
I mean, you're a sweeper! ...trapped inside a physicist's body.
David: Rrrreally.
Phoebe: Oh, yeah, oh, I'm sure of it.
You should just do it, just sweep and throw me.
David: ...Now? Now?
Phoebe: Oh yeah, right now.
David: Okay, okay, okay.
(Gets ready to sweep, and then picks up a laptop computer)
Y'know what, this was just really expensive.
(Puts it down elsewhere. Then picks up a microscope)
And I'll take- this was a gift. (Moves it)
Phoebe: Okay, now you're just kinda tidying.
David: Okay, what the hell, what the hell.
(Sweeps the remaining papers off the desk and grabs Phoebe)
You want me to actually throw you or you-you wanna just hop?
Phoebe: I can hop. (She hops onto the table)
(They kiss, finally)
--
is decorating for Christmas.]
Ross: Come here, Marcel. Sit here. (Marcel wanders off)
Rachel: Pheebs, I can't believe he hasn't kissed you yet.
I mean God, by my sixth date with Paolo,
I mean he had already named both my breasts!
...Ooh. Did I just share too much?
Ross: Just a smidge.
Phoebe: David's like, y'know, Scientist Guy. He's very methodical.
Monica: I think it's romantic.
Phoebe: Me too! Oh! Did you ever see An Officer and a Gentleman?
Rachel: Yeah!
Phoebe: Well, he's kinda like the guy I went to see that with.
Except, except he-he's smarter, and gentler, and sweeter...
I just- I just wanna be with him all the time.
Day and night, and night and day... and special occasions...
Chandler: Wait a minute, wait a minute, I see where this is going,
you're gonna ask him to New Year's, aren't you.
You're gonna break the pact. She's gonna break the pact.
Phoebe: No, no, no, no, no, no. Yeah, could I just?
Chandler: Yeah, 'cause I already asked Janice.
Monica: What?!
Ross: C'mon, this was a pact! This was your pact!
Chandler: I snapped, okay? I couldn't handle the pressure and I snapped.
Monica: Yeah, but Janice? That-that was like the worst breakup in history!
Chandler: I'm not saying it was a good idea, I'm saying I snapped!
[Joey enters, his shoes have bells on, which jingle as he walks.
He is wearing a long coat.]
Joey: Hi. Hi, sorry I'm late.
(He removes the coat to reveal an elf costume)
Chandler: Too many jokes... must mock Joey!
Joey: Nice shoes, huh? (He wiggles his foot and the bells tinkle)
Chandler: Aah, y'killing me!
(Marcel knocks over some kitchen tools)
Monica: Ross! He's playing with my spatulas again!
Ross: Okay, look, he's not gonna hurt them, right?
Monica: Do you always have to bring him here?
Ross: I didn't wanna leave him alone. Alright?
We- we had our first fight this morning.
I think it has to do with my working late.
I said some things that I didn't mean, and he- he threw some faeces...
Chandler: Y'know, if you're gonna work late,
I could look in on him for you.
Ross: Oh, that'd be great! Okay, but if you do,
make sure it seems like you're there to see him,
okay, and you're not like doing it as a favour to me.
Chandler: Okay, but if he asks, I'm not going to lie.
[Scene: Max and David's lab, David is explaining something to Phoebe
with the aid of a whiteboard.]
David: ...But, you can't actually test this theory,
because today's particle accelerators are nowhere near powerful enough
to simulate these conditions.
Phoebe: Okay, alright, I have a question, then.
David: Yuh.
Phoebe: Um, were you planning on kissing me ever?
David: Uh, that's definitely a, uh, valid question.
And, uh, the answer would be (Writes YES on the board) yes.
Yes I was. But, see, I wanted it to be this phenomenal kiss
that happened at this phenomenal moment,
because, well, 'cause it's you.
Phoebe: Sure.
David: Right. But, see, the longer I waited,
the more phenomenal the kiss had to be,
and now we've reached a place where it's just gotta be
one of those things where I just like...
sweep everything off the table and throw you down on it.
And, uh, I'm not really a, uh, sweeping sorta fella.
Phoebe: Oh, David, I, I think you are a sweeping sorta fella.
I mean, you're a sweeper! ...trapped inside a physicist's body.
David: Rrrreally.
Phoebe: Oh, yeah, oh, I'm sure of it.
You should just do it, just sweep and throw me.
David: ...Now? Now?
Phoebe: Oh yeah, right now.
David: Okay, okay, okay.
(Gets ready to sweep, and then picks up a laptop computer)
Y'know what, this was just really expensive.
(Puts it down elsewhere. Then picks up a microscope)
And I'll take- this was a gift. (Moves it)
Phoebe: Okay, now you're just kinda tidying.
David: Okay, what the hell, what the hell.
(Sweeps the remaining papers off the desk and grabs Phoebe)
You want me to actually throw you or you-you wanna just hop?
Phoebe: I can hop. (She hops onto the table)
(They kiss, finally)
--
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