Part3
[Scene: Phoebe's Massage Parlor, Phoebe's assistant is telling her
about the changes to her schedule.]
Phoebe's Assistant: We've got a couple changes in your schedule.
Your 4:00 herbal massage has been pushed back to 4:30
and Miss Somerfield canceled her 5:30 shiatsu.
Phoebe: Ok, thanks. (assistant leaves, then walks back in)
Phoebe's Assistant: Oh, here comes your 3:00.
I don't mean to sound unprofessional, but, yum
(walks out, Paolo enters)
Paolo: Buon Giorno, Bella Phoebe!
Phoebe: Oh, Paolo, hi, what are you doing here?
Paolo: Uh, Racquela tell me you massage, eh?
Phoebe: Well, Racquela's right, yeah!
(Paolo speaks Italian)
Phoebe: Oh, okay, I don't know what you just said, so let's get started.
Paolo: Uh, I am, uh, being naked?
Phoebe: Um, that's really your decision, I mean, some people prefer,
you know, to take off...oh whoops! You're being naked!
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone but Phoebe is there.]
Rachel: (to Ross) I can't believe you don't want to know.
I mean, I couldn't not know, I mean, if, if the doctor knows,
and Carol knows, and Susan knows....
Monica: And Monica knows...
Ross: Wha, heh, how could you know, I don't even know!
Monica: Carol called me to thank me for the lasagna, I asked, she told me.
Joey: So what's it gonna be?
(Monica whispers in Joey's ear.
Ross gets up and waves arms frantically in protest)
Ross: Wait—oh—hey—huh, oh great now he knows, and I don't know!
Monica: I'm sorry, I'm just excited about being an aunt!
Joey: Or an uncle...
(Phoebe enters)
Joey and Chandler: Hey Phoebe!
Ross: Hi Pheebs!
Rachel: Pheebs!
Phoebe: Fine!
Monica: Phoebe, what's the matter?
Phoebe: Nothing, I'm sorry, I'm just, I'm out of sorts.
Customer: Hey, can we get some cappuccino over here?
Rachel: Oh, right, that's me!
Joey: Hey, Chandler, that table place closes at 7, come on.
Chandler: Fine. (Joey and Chandler walk towards the door)
Monica: Phoebe, what is it?
Phoebe: All right, you know Paolo?
Ross: I'm familiar with his work, yes...
Phoebe: Well, he made a move on me.
(Joey and Chandler come back)
Joey: Whoa, store will be open tomorrow!
Chandler: More coffee over here, please!
Commercial Break
[Scene: Central Perk, continued from earlier.]
Monica: Well, what happened?
Phoebe: Well, he came in for a massage, and everything was fine until.
(A flashback starts Paolo, lying on massage table,
moving his hands up Phoebe's legs.)
[Cut back to Central Perk.]
Joey and Chandler: Ooooohh!
Ross: My God.
Monica: Are you sure?
(The flashback resumes with Paolo grabbing her butt.)
[Cut back to Central Perk.]
Phoebe: Oh yeah, I'm sure.
(Flashback resumes with Phoebe doing a voiceover.)
And all of a sudden his hands weren't the problem anymore.
(Flashback continues: Paolo rolls over, Phoebe looks down,
then quickly looks up, bites lip, shakes her head)
Monica: Was it...?
Phoebe: Oh, boy scouts could have camped under there.
Guys: Oooooo....
(Rachel runs over)
Rachel: "Ooo," what?
Phoebe: Uma Thurman.
Monica: Oh!
Ross: The actress!
(all talking indistinctly, high-fiving)
Ross: Thanks Rach.
(Rachel walks away)
Chandler: So what are you gonna do?
Ross: You have to tell her! You have to tell her!
It's your moral obligation, as a friend, as a woman,
I think it's a feminist issue! Guys? Guys?
(waiting for guys to chime in)
Chandler: Oh, yeah, you have to tell her.
Joey: Feminist issue. That's where I went!
Phoebe: She is gonna hate me.
Ross:(sympathetic yet...) Yeah, well...
--
[Scene: Phoebe's Massage Parlor, Phoebe's assistant is telling her
about the changes to her schedule.]
Phoebe's Assistant: We've got a couple changes in your schedule.
Your 4:00 herbal massage has been pushed back to 4:30
and Miss Somerfield canceled her 5:30 shiatsu.
Phoebe: Ok, thanks. (assistant leaves, then walks back in)
Phoebe's Assistant: Oh, here comes your 3:00.
I don't mean to sound unprofessional, but, yum
(walks out, Paolo enters)
Paolo: Buon Giorno, Bella Phoebe!
Phoebe: Oh, Paolo, hi, what are you doing here?
Paolo: Uh, Racquela tell me you massage, eh?
Phoebe: Well, Racquela's right, yeah!
(Paolo speaks Italian)
Phoebe: Oh, okay, I don't know what you just said, so let's get started.
Paolo: Uh, I am, uh, being naked?
Phoebe: Um, that's really your decision, I mean, some people prefer,
you know, to take off...oh whoops! You're being naked!
[Scene: Central Perk, everyone but Phoebe is there.]
Rachel: (to Ross) I can't believe you don't want to know.
I mean, I couldn't not know, I mean, if, if the doctor knows,
and Carol knows, and Susan knows....
Monica: And Monica knows...
Ross: Wha, heh, how could you know, I don't even know!
Monica: Carol called me to thank me for the lasagna, I asked, she told me.
Joey: So what's it gonna be?
(Monica whispers in Joey's ear.
Ross gets up and waves arms frantically in protest)
Ross: Wait—oh—hey—huh, oh great now he knows, and I don't know!
Monica: I'm sorry, I'm just excited about being an aunt!
Joey: Or an uncle...
(Phoebe enters)
Joey and Chandler: Hey Phoebe!
Ross: Hi Pheebs!
Rachel: Pheebs!
Phoebe: Fine!
Monica: Phoebe, what's the matter?
Phoebe: Nothing, I'm sorry, I'm just, I'm out of sorts.
Customer: Hey, can we get some cappuccino over here?
Rachel: Oh, right, that's me!
Joey: Hey, Chandler, that table place closes at 7, come on.
Chandler: Fine. (Joey and Chandler walk towards the door)
Monica: Phoebe, what is it?
Phoebe: All right, you know Paolo?
Ross: I'm familiar with his work, yes...
Phoebe: Well, he made a move on me.
(Joey and Chandler come back)
Joey: Whoa, store will be open tomorrow!
Chandler: More coffee over here, please!
Commercial Break
[Scene: Central Perk, continued from earlier.]
Monica: Well, what happened?
Phoebe: Well, he came in for a massage, and everything was fine until.
(A flashback starts Paolo, lying on massage table,
moving his hands up Phoebe's legs.)
[Cut back to Central Perk.]
Joey and Chandler: Ooooohh!
Ross: My God.
Monica: Are you sure?
(The flashback resumes with Paolo grabbing her butt.)
[Cut back to Central Perk.]
Phoebe: Oh yeah, I'm sure.
(Flashback resumes with Phoebe doing a voiceover.)
And all of a sudden his hands weren't the problem anymore.
(Flashback continues: Paolo rolls over, Phoebe looks down,
then quickly looks up, bites lip, shakes her head)
Monica: Was it...?
Phoebe: Oh, boy scouts could have camped under there.
Guys: Oooooo....
(Rachel runs over)
Rachel: "Ooo," what?
Phoebe: Uma Thurman.
Monica: Oh!
Ross: The actress!
(all talking indistinctly, high-fiving)
Ross: Thanks Rach.
(Rachel walks away)
Chandler: So what are you gonna do?
Ross: You have to tell her! You have to tell her!
It's your moral obligation, as a friend, as a woman,
I think it's a feminist issue! Guys? Guys?
(waiting for guys to chime in)
Chandler: Oh, yeah, you have to tell her.
Joey: Feminist issue. That's where I went!
Phoebe: She is gonna hate me.
Ross:(sympathetic yet...) Yeah, well...
--
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