121 The One With The Fake Monica –Part 2
[Scene: A Tap Class, the girls are standing at the door.]
Monica: What d'you think?
Phoebe: Lotsa things.
(They go in and sit down.)
Rachel: Which one do you think she is?
(The teacher comes up to them.)
Teacher: May I help you?
Monica: Oh, no thanks, we're just here to observe.
Teacher: You don't observe a dance class. You dance a dance class.
Spare shoes are over there.
Rachel: What does she mean?
Phoebe: I think she means (Imitates) 'You dance a dance class'.
Oh, c'mon, c'mon. (They put on some spare shoes)
Monica: Okay, d'y'see anybody you think could be me?
Teacher: (To the class) People! Last time there were some empty yoghurt
containers lying around after class.
Let's not have that happen again!
Rachel: She could be you.
(Music starts)
Teacher: Let's get started. Five, six, a-five six seven eight...
(Everyone starts to dance in unison. Monica flounders)
Monica: Okay, I'm not getting this!
Phoebe: (Dancing in a swirly, Phoebe kind of way) I'm totally getting it!
Monica: Did you ever feel like sometimes
you are just so unbelievably uncoordinated?
(Rachel taps into view; she is in perfect sync with the rest of the class)
Rachel: What? You just click when they click.
Teacher: Alright people, now everyone grab a partner.
(The girls are unsure how to pair off. Phoebe settles it)
Phoebe: Okay. And, my, dead, mother, says, you, are, it. I'm with Rachel.
Monica: Great. It's gym class all over again.
Phoebe and Rachel: Aww.
Teacher: Well that's all right, you can come up to the front
and dance with me.
Monica: Why don't I just take off my clothes and have a nightmare.
(She starts to walk very slowly toward the front of the room.
The teacher grabs her hand and pulls her. Suddenly a woman bursts in)
Woman: It's okay, it's okay, I'm here, I'm here.
Sorry I'm late, okay, here I am. Who's the new tense girl?
Teacher: She's your partner.
Woman: Hi. I'm Monica.
Monica: Oh. Monica! ...Hi. I'm Mo- ...nana.
Woman: (Fake Monica) Monana?
Monica: Yeah. It's Dutch.
Fake Monica: You're kidding! I-I spent three years in Amsterdam.
(Asks her something in Dutch)
Monica: Um, Pennsylvania Dutch.
Teacher: And we're dancing. A-five, six, seven, eight...
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is entering.]
Ross: (Mortified) Hi.
Chandler and Joey: Hey.
Joey: Where've you been?
Ross: At the vet.
Chandler: She's not gonna make you wear
one of those big plastic cones, is she?
Ross: She says Marcel's humping thing's not a phase.
Apparently he's reached sexual maturity.
Joey: (To Chandler) Hey! He beat ya.
Ross: She says as time goes on,
he's gonna start getting agressive and violent.
Chandler: So what does this mean?
Ross: I'm gonna have to give him up.
Commercial Break
--
[Scene: A Tap Class, the girls are standing at the door.]
Monica: What d'you think?
Phoebe: Lotsa things.
(They go in and sit down.)
Rachel: Which one do you think she is?
(The teacher comes up to them.)
Teacher: May I help you?
Monica: Oh, no thanks, we're just here to observe.
Teacher: You don't observe a dance class. You dance a dance class.
Spare shoes are over there.
Rachel: What does she mean?
Phoebe: I think she means (Imitates) 'You dance a dance class'.
Oh, c'mon, c'mon. (They put on some spare shoes)
Monica: Okay, d'y'see anybody you think could be me?
Teacher: (To the class) People! Last time there were some empty yoghurt
containers lying around after class.
Let's not have that happen again!
Rachel: She could be you.
(Music starts)
Teacher: Let's get started. Five, six, a-five six seven eight...
(Everyone starts to dance in unison. Monica flounders)
Monica: Okay, I'm not getting this!
Phoebe: (Dancing in a swirly, Phoebe kind of way) I'm totally getting it!
Monica: Did you ever feel like sometimes
you are just so unbelievably uncoordinated?
(Rachel taps into view; she is in perfect sync with the rest of the class)
Rachel: What? You just click when they click.
Teacher: Alright people, now everyone grab a partner.
(The girls are unsure how to pair off. Phoebe settles it)
Phoebe: Okay. And, my, dead, mother, says, you, are, it. I'm with Rachel.
Monica: Great. It's gym class all over again.
Phoebe and Rachel: Aww.
Teacher: Well that's all right, you can come up to the front
and dance with me.
Monica: Why don't I just take off my clothes and have a nightmare.
(She starts to walk very slowly toward the front of the room.
The teacher grabs her hand and pulls her. Suddenly a woman bursts in)
Woman: It's okay, it's okay, I'm here, I'm here.
Sorry I'm late, okay, here I am. Who's the new tense girl?
Teacher: She's your partner.
Woman: Hi. I'm Monica.
Monica: Oh. Monica! ...Hi. I'm Mo- ...nana.
Woman: (Fake Monica) Monana?
Monica: Yeah. It's Dutch.
Fake Monica: You're kidding! I-I spent three years in Amsterdam.
(Asks her something in Dutch)
Monica: Um, Pennsylvania Dutch.
Teacher: And we're dancing. A-five, six, seven, eight...
[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is entering.]
Ross: (Mortified) Hi.
Chandler and Joey: Hey.
Joey: Where've you been?
Ross: At the vet.
Chandler: She's not gonna make you wear
one of those big plastic cones, is she?
Ross: She says Marcel's humping thing's not a phase.
Apparently he's reached sexual maturity.
Joey: (To Chandler) Hey! He beat ya.
Ross: She says as time goes on,
he's gonna start getting agressive and violent.
Chandler: So what does this mean?
Ross: I'm gonna have to give him up.
Commercial Break
--
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