123-part 04 - 六人行

[Scene: The Broom Closet, Ross has used a broom
to open the air vent in the ceiling.
Phoebe is wearing a janitor's uniform, ready to go up in the vent.]

Ross: Ok, got the vent open.

Phoebe: (reading the nametag on the uniform) Hi, I'm Ben.
I'm hospital worker Ben. It's Ben... to the rescue!

Ross: Ben, you ready? All right, gimme your foot. Ok, on three, Ben.
One, two, three. Ok, That's it, Ben.

(Ross and Susan lift Phoebe up into the vent.)

Susan: What do you see?

Phoebe: Well, Susan, I see what appears to be a dark vent. Wait.
Yes, it is in fact a dark vent.

(A janitor opens the closet door from the outside.)

Ross: Phoebs, It's open! It's open!

(Ross and Susan run to the delivery room,
leaving Phoebe dangling from the vent.)

Janitor: (to Ross and Susan) Wait! You forgot your legs!

[Scene: Carol's Room, Ross and Susan rush in.]

All: Push, push!

Ross: We're here!

Carol: (irked) Where have you been?

Ross: Long story, honey.

Dr. Franzblau: All right, Carol, I need you to keep pushing.
I need—(reaches for an instrument, Rachel's hand is on it)
Excuse me, could I have this?

Nurse: All right, all right, there's a few too many people in this room,
and there's about to be one more,
so anybody who's not an ex-husband or a lesbian life partner,
out you go!

All: Good luck!

(Everyone heads for the door.)

Chandler: (to nurse) Let me ask you,
do you have to be Carol's lesbian life partner?

Nurse: Out!

Dr. Franzblau: All right, he's crowning. Here he comes.

Ross: Let me see, I gotta see, I gotta see. Oh, a head.
Oh, it's, it's huge. Carol, how are you doing this?

Carol: (straining) Not.... helping!

Dr. Franzblau: You're doing great, you're doing fine.

Ross: (puts his head near the baby) Hello! (to Dr. Franzblau) Oh, sorry.

Susan: What do you see? What do you see?

Ross: We got a head, we got shoulders, we got arms, we got,
oh, look at the little fingers, oh, and a chest, and a stomach.
It's a boy, definitely a boy! All right!
Ok, legs, knees, and feet. Oh, oh. He's here. He's a person.

Susan: Oh, look at that.

Carol: What does he look like?

Ross: Kinda like my uncle Ed, covered in Jell-o.

Carol: Really?

Phoebe: (from the air vent overhead) You guys, he's beautiful!

Ross: Oh, thanks, Pheebs!

(They look up towards the vent and wave at Phoebe.)

[Scene: The Delivery Room, Carol is holding the infant.]

Susan: No shouting, but we still need a name for this little guy.

Ross: (thinking) How 'bout Ben?

Susan: I like Ben.

Carol: Ben. Ben. Ben's good. How come you never mentioned Ben before?

Ross: We uh, we just cooked it up.

Susan: That's what we were off doing.

(Monica opens the door.)

Monica: Hi.

Ross: Hey.

Monica: Can we come in?

(The whole gang enters.)

Ross: (to Ben) I know, I know. Everybody,
there's someone I'd like you to meet. Yeah.
This is Ben. Ben, this is everybody.

Phoebe: Susan, he looks just like you.

Susan: Thanks.

Rachel: Oh, god, I can't believe one of us actually has one of these.

Chandler: I know, I still am one of these.

Monica: Ross, can I?

(Monica holds Ben.)

Ross: The head, the head. You gotta...

Monica: (getting choked up) Hi, Ben. Hi. I'm your Aunt Monica.
Yes I am. I'm your Aunt Monica. I...I will always have gum.

Closing Credits

[Scene: The Hospital, the camera is placed
as though it were Ben's eyes.]

Ross: Ben, I want you to know that there may be some times
when I may not be around, like this.
(walks out of the picture) But I'll still always come back, like this.
(returns) And sometimes I may be away longer, like this.
(walks away) But I'll still always come back, like this. (returns)

(Chandler comes into the picture.)

Chandler: And sometimes, I'll want you to steal third,
and I'll go like this. (Does a baseball sign.)

(The rest of the group come into the picture.)

Monica: He is so amazing.

Rachel: Oh, I know. Look at him.

Joey: Ben, Ben, hey Ben. Nothing. I don't think that's his name.

Phoebe: Oh, look, look, he's closing his eyes.
(screen goes blank) Look, he's opening his eyes.
(picture comes back)

Joey: He doesn't do much, does he?

Ross: No, this is pretty much it.

(long moment of silence)

Rachel: You guys wanna get some coffee?

All: Yeah.

Ross: All right, I'll see you guys later.

(They all leave but Ross, but they all come back a few seconds later.
They make faces at the baby.)

Phoebe: Oh, look, he's closing his eyes again.

(The screen fades to black.)

End

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