122-part 02 - 六人行

122 The One With the Ick Factor -part 2


[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Rachel are there.
Monica is just finishing cleaning the windows.]

Monica: Windows are clean, candels are lit.
Uh, belt's too tight, gotta change the belt.
Did I turn the fish?
(goes over to the kitchen to check on the dinner)
No, cause I made lasagne. (to Rachel) Am I out of control?

Rachel: Just a touch. Mon, I don't understand.
I mean, you've been dating this guy since like, what... his midterms?
I mean, why all the sudden are you so... Oh.

Monica: What?

Rachel: Could tonight be the Night?

Monica: I don't know. Look he's a great guy
and I love being with him but... you know.
Things happen, and they happen. You don't plan these things.

Rachel: So, did you shave your legs?

Monica: Yeah.

Rachel: A-ha!

[Scene: Central Perk. Joey and Ross are there.]

Joey: Would you let it go Ross. It was just a dream. It doesn't mean...

(Ross's beeper goes off)

Ross: Oh, oh. Oh, oh. Oh this is it.
Oh my god it's baby time. Baby time.

Joey: All right, relax, relax. Just relax, just relax.
Be cool, be cool.

(Ross dials a number on his cellular phone)

Ross: (on phone) Yeah, hi, I was just beeped.
(pause) No, Andre is not here.
(to Joey) Third time today.
(on phone) Yes, I'm sure... No, sir.
I don't perform those kind of services.

Joey: Services? (Ross looks at him) Oh, services.

Ross: (on phone) Yeah, you want 55-JUMBO.
Yeah, that's right. That's right, JUMBO with a U, sir.
(pause) No, belive me, you don't want me.
Judging by his number, I'd be a huge disappointment.
(pause) All rightie, bye bye.

(Phoebe and Chandler enter)

Joey: Hey, hey. How was the first day?

Phoebe: Oh, exellent. Everyone was so, so nice.

Chandler: See, it pays to know the man who wears my shoes.
(Joey and Ross wonder what he means) Me.

Phoebe: No, I didn't tell anybody that I knew you.

Chandler: Why not?

Phoebe: Oh, because, you know... they don't like you.

Chandler: What?!

Phoebe: I thought you knew that.

Chandler: Noho. Who doesn't they like me?

Phoebe: Everyone. Except for uh... no everyone.

Chandler: What are you talking about?

Phoebe: Don't feel bad. You know they used to like you a lot.
But then you got promoted, and, you know,
now you're like "Mr. Boss Man".
You know, Mr. Bing. Mr. Bing, "Boss Man Bing".

(Joey and Ross laughs)

Chandler: I can't belive it.

Phoebe: Yeah, yeah. They even do you.

Chandler: They do me?

Phoebe: You know like... uh okay... uh...
'Could that report be any later?'

(Joey and Ross laughs)

Chandler: I don't sound like that.

Ross: Oh, oh Chandler...

Joey: Oh... Yeah, you do.

Ross: 'The hills were alive with the sound of music.'

(Phoebe, Joey and Ross laughs)

Joey: (reaches for hi scones) My scones.

Phoebe, Joey, and Ross: 'My scones.'

(Phoebe, Joey and Ross laughs again)

Chandler: Okay, I don't sound like that. That is so not true.

(Joey and Chandler laughs)

Chandler: That is so not... That is so not... That... Oh, shut up!

(Phoebe, Joey and Ross laugh)

[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Monica and Young Ethan are
sitting in the couch.]

Monica: Did not.

Young Ethan: I am telling you, up until I was, like nine,
I thought that gunpoint was an actual place where crimes happen.

Monica: How was that possible?

Young Ethan: Well, think about it. It's always on the news.
'A man is being held up, at gunpoint.'
'Tourists are being terrorised, at gunpoint.'
And I just kept thinking: why does people continue to go there?
(He checks his watch.) Oh, ah. I should go.

Monica: Okay.

(They kiss)

Young Ethan: Okay.

Monica: Unless...

Young Ethan: What?

Monica: Uh, ah. Unless you wanna stay over? I mean, I'm going to, so...

Young Ethan: Yeah, I'd really like that.

(They kiss)

Young Ethan: Uuh, before we get into any staying-over-stuff,
there is something you should know.

Monica: Okay, is this like 'I have an early class tomorrow'
or 'I'm secretly married to a goat?'

Young Ethan: Well it's somewhere in between.
You see, in a strictly technical sense, of course,
I'm not uh..., well I, I mean I haven't ever uh...

Monica: Ethan?

Young Ethan: Yeah?

Monica: Are you a virgin?

Young Ethan: Well, if that's what you kids are calling it these days then,
yes I am. I uh, I've kinda been waiting for the right person.

Monica: Really?

Young Ethan: Yeah. You do know I was talking about you, right?

(They kiss)

[Time lapse. They are now in Monica's bedroom, on the bed.]

Young Ethan: Wow!

Monica: You keep saying that.

Young Ethan: You know, you read about it, you see it in the movies.
Even when you practice it at home, man oh man,
it is nothing like that.

(They kiss)

Monica: Listen, uh, you told me something that was really difficult for you.
And I, I-I figured if you could be honest, then I can to.

Young Ethan: Oh god, don't tell me, I did it wrong.

Monica: No-no. Nothing wrong about that.

Young Ethan: Oh.

Monica: Um, okay, here it goes. I'm not 22. I'm, I'm 25...
and thirteen months.

Young Ethan: Huh!

Monica: But I figured, you know, that shouldn't change anything.
I mean, what the hell does it matter how old we are.

(They kiss)

Young Ethan: Uh, listen um, as long as we're telling stuff, uh,
I have another one for you. I'm a little younger than I said.

Monica: You're not a senior?

Young Ethan: Oh, I'm a senior... in High School.

Monica: Ok...ay.

Commercial Break

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